This photo should be on fuckyeahseptums :D

xxcheshire-katxx:

I bet her fat ugly finger is going to get a cramp from all of her blocking.

No one cares anymore, Ms. Croft, so fuck off and get over it.

We all have better things to do, dumb cunt.

I look like a football player in a bikini? Please. You must weigh at least 50 pounds more than I do. You look like Shrek’s girlfriend. Yeah, Fiona as an ogre. That’s exactly your body type. Cow. You’re huge. Too huge for life.

Of course you’ll read this, you’re such a terrible liar. I’m not going to act proud. If I have the means to taunt you, I will. Its fun.

Having fun beating a dead horse? Get a life you cunt.

I opened up my heart to him. Bared it all like I’ve wanted to for the past 10 months. Truth be told, I’m crazy about him. Doesn’t matter if I had a different boyfriend for a while. I knew he was still that special one.

And I have this wonderful vision. Of us lying in a field, conjoined at the heart, smiling up into the sunny sky.

Just smiling, finally healthy, no bad thoughts, no pain.

Its been super forever since I posted a blog entry, so here we go. Lets make it simple.

FIVE THINGS THAT MAKE ME HAPPY!

1.) Almost all of my co workers are sweet as can be and even told me they want to come to one of my theater/music shows! And I know its genuine since I’ve grown and evolved this friendship with them over the past 6 months of working with them. It wasn’t this way at all for the first few months, but over time I have definitely bonded with them and they are all so sweet and make work enjoyable :]

2.) I’m quitting smoking with the help of the coolest e-cigarette ever.

3.) My bunny is a good boy and poops and pees in his litterbox like he is supposed to!

4.) Now that I am off stupid Lamictal, my hair is suddenly long and thick and healthy! Like WOW I don’t even know what to do with it all! I’m not used to having so much hair but honestly I am really loving it!

5.) I’ve bonded even more with a very special friend and I feel lucky to have him.

Now that good news is over, its time for….bad news. Bad news and also just icky news. Some really bad and others just…me whining and complaining.

1.) Sue passed away. She was the mother of my really good friend Joe. I love Joe dearly and I love Steve too, her husband. I am very sad about this.

2.) My thyroid condition is causing my feet to be hot for no reason, ONLY at night time. All I want to do is wrap my burning feet in ice cold towels, all night long.

3.) My septum ring hole closed up for good :/ No more piercing for me.

4.) I’m confused about certain things, and it fucking sucks.

5.) I know I just said I have really awesome co-workers, but I have ONE who tattled on me today and accused me of not drying my german shepherd completely. Even though I cleared it up with my manager, it still fucking sucks that she had the gall to tattle.

As you can see my grammar is horrid, so my brain isn’t working properly. I guess that’s what happens after a 9 hour work day where I am non stop on my feet, caring for animals. Check out the scratch mark on my face from a very naughty australian shepherd puppy named Norah. She attacked the entire salon, literally. Everyone who touched her has bite or scratch marks:

There we go. Overall, I grade my mood a 4 out of 5 stars. I’m a very lucky girl and happy, but life just has its ups and downs :]

-Jennay

This eruption, this stagnation

You didn’t know I had it in me

With-held my love, kept in a capsule

I didn’t know you had it in you

I don’t really like calling people “ugly,” but it is easy to call her ugly because she is truly, 100% ugly: She’s not only heavy with a face that looks like she ran into a brick wall, but her heart and soul is hideous and disgusting. She’s a nasty, mean, catty, manipulative bitter person that hardly anyone I know can stand. If she were a sweet girl, I would be able to ignore her unfortunate outer looks, but since she’s ugly inside, she’s really ugly on the outside too.

She just needs to do herself a favor and delete her Tumblr. She’s so disgusting that its easy for her to upset everyone around her. So instead of giving all of us nausea, she should just, you know, disappear from the face of the internet, and use a paper journal instead. I’m sorry dear, but nobody thinks you’re smart, nobody thinks you’re beautiful, and you have dug your own grave with your nasty behavior. From what I’ve heard you’ve lost like 90% of your friends. I’m not surprised. I’m happy I trolled your formspring and I’m even happier it upset you so deeply. You do NOT have thick skin. You’re just a big whiny fat baby who is easily offended. I think if you lost 50 pounds and got a third nose job you would still be ugly. No, if you looked like Angelina Jolie you would still be the ugliest girl I have ever seen, because your soul is hideous.

You are a bad person. No question about it.

PMS is a terrible thing. It causes me to fly into blind rages and suddenly become angry over insignificant things. So when one of the girls in my cast is bitchy to me for no reason, its very hard. Especially when I’m nursing an eye injury, and being surrounded by tons of very eccentric, loud people. Thankfully Patrick understood when I was being irrational. He’s so good to me, and so understanding. So patient, calm, and loving.

In my tizzy I blurted out to Patrick on our way home: “Why do you love me?!”

He told me its because I am so sweet, and he loves how much I care for people. I guess that’s true. And he says I treat him so well. Which is also true. I offer him my apartment and a fridge with food at all times, I am understanding and patient with him, and I make him feel like a man. Isn’t that what any man wants? A best friend who loves him for who he is and makes him feel good, as well as a lover?

It made me feel really good to hear that he feels I treat him amazingly. I know that I do, but sometimes its nice to hear it directly from him.

But I guess I always haven’t been sweet. Interacting with people has always been puzzling and hard for me. I’ve hurt a lot of people. Maybe social skills just didn’t come naturally to me. But I know in my heart I’ve made up for it by always being sweet and apologetic and understanding. Who knows. I try really hard. Some people are just good with people but I had to learn how to be good with people.

And I’m thrilled that I can finally treat somebody I love with the care I know they deserve in my heart. Maybe it took a lot of growing up and a lot of practice. All I know is, I’m so glad he feels my love for him, because I sure as hell feel it from him.

And when I think of those past memories, they still belong to yesterday. And the day before that, and the day before that. Time has turned into a haze, a blob, an invisible smoke. Things have blown over. The ocean has come and washed it away.

Some memories I loved, some memories make me cringe. Pain is always only temporary when I realize they are just memories. Just that transluscent mist. I can see it, I can feel it, but its just not there any longer. Only to haunt me in my dreams.